Being a mom is what I always wanted to be. I had no career aspirations; I wanted my children, my family, to be my “job.”
I started out getting my wish and was a stay-at-home mom for 10 years. I had no idea how hard that was going to be. The isolation, the constant need for my attention. I also had no idea it would take its toll on the relationship with my husband.
Of course, the economy crashing, didn’t help things and the stress from it all was overwhelming. At the time, even though I was choosing to stay home with my kids I still wanted to contribute financially and taught piano lessons, found ways to earn money online and started a travel agency business.
Juggling work and home WHEN you work from home is a WHOLE other ballgame. I found that most of the time, my work took last place. Which made it pretty difficult to get anywhere.
Fast forward to now, I have new stresses and I am surrounded by other women feeling their own constraints. From financial stress to the guilt of trying to balance work and home life, the list is never-ending it seems.
Stress and Motherhood
These two definitely seem to go hand in hand. But what I’m discovering is that they don’t necessarily need to.
The U.S., in particular, is not terribly supportive of women who wish to pursue both paths. In fact, new research suggests that saving U.S. mothers should be a national priority.
And to me, that makes sense. Think about it. Remember the old saying? A happy mom makes a happy home.
If mothers aren’t happy, the world suffers.
With a little help, support and understanding I think ALL mothers could be thriving. Regardless of if they choose to work from home or outside of it, mothers juggle A LOT! Just keeping the home fires burning, the children happy, healthy, fed and in line for school is enough to keep someone busy, but add to that most of the time we like to have something else too, something that makes us feel WHOLE. A passion, a job, a hobby, what have you . . . and bringing that into the mix tends to have our plates overflowing.
So how do you juggle it all without dropping something? Without losing your sanity?
You have to remember that you are human. Even though it may seem at times that you are a superhero . . . everyone, even Clark Kent, has his limits.
Know yours.
When you are spending time planning out your day, week or months, always schedule time for yourself. AND schedule time for nothing.
Trust me, you’ll fill that space for nothing with something when the time comes, but overbooking yourself is the FIRST step to ensure a meltdown.
Avoid Meltdowns
You can avoid meltdowns easily by not overextending yourself. Even if there are a million things to do, there are ways to schedule and plan to keep it all from being too much all at once. Remember . . . one thing at a time.
Prioritize
While your children and significant other are important . . . SO ARE YOU.
Mark your calendar with the necessities, things that cannot be avoided or rescheduled and then see what is left. If there is nothing left, then you need to reassess everyone’s schedule or figure out how to delegate so it doesn’t all fall to you. You are just one person. You cannot be in two places at once and you NEED to make sure you have time for yourself to recharge.
Work is not YOU time
It may be tempting to think that anything that is YOURS, be it work, a passion project or a hobby is YOU time. But that simply is just another form of work. It isn’t for someone else, but it is still work. So make sure you plan some time each week that is simply downtime.
How you choose to spend that downtime is up to you. It can even be time spent with the kids playing games, going for a walk together or watching a movie. But it must be FUN and relaxing for it to count.
You also need to make sure that you schedule some quiet time just for yourself. I find going for a 30-minute walk each day is ideal. It is a form of meditation. Not only are you getting some exercise, but it is extremely calming to your soul.
Mothers are stressed out. Let’s face it. It’s become an epidemic and it seems to only be getting worse.
It’s time to turn that around, one mom at a time. Start with yourself. And then when you see other mothers around you struggling, reach out and help them find their work-life balance too.
Pay It Forward
Bring the calm. Share the knowledge. Share the peace.
I personally have found a way to juggle it all and 98% of the time I do not feel stress. The only stress that happens for me now is when I’m sitting in traffic if I need to be somewhere on time. And even those moments are teaching me patience.
I have discovered a way to take a vacation every day. I have found the perfect form of exercise developed specifically for women, and I have created an easy to follow and healthy diet that keeps me feeling at my best.
But I still see women struggling around me and I want to help.
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Motherhood will always have its challenges, but it doesn’t have to be to the extremes that it has become.
If you don’t know where to start to begin your transformation to a happy, healthy, calm, fit and chill mom, please contact me.
Leave a comment below with your biggest struggle.
Your friend,
Kat
nurturingyourbody.com
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